little thoughts worthy of sharing.

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i'm thinking about starting a series on this blog to take note of those moments when a few positive highlights stream through my mind, transforming my day. I would call them epiphanies, but they're not exactly that. they're little, simple notions imbued with a hint of gratitude. I would love to look back and go through this blog remembering them, realising how a few of those moments eventually snowball to change one's mindset and allow healing to take place.

so, here are little throughts worthy of sharing that bubbled through me today.

  • there's something stunningly beautiful in allowing oneself to rest without guilt. I wonder if being ill so often is teaching me that.
  • miraculous things happen when we don't plan for them. since I'm weak and ill, I didn't plan to go for my daily walk today. however, by the afternoon, I decided to smell some fresh air, especially that the sun came out for a little while. my gift for embracing the unexpected was seeing the first snowfall on the grass and treelogs. it was enchantingly beautiful to be so genuinely happy, skipping around and touching the snow with so much love.

  • lately, I've been focusing on doing my work with love instead of just getting through it and being done with it. I put on some classical music and sacredly put myself into crafting the most interactive sessions with my learners who are more like family now. I'm deeply grateful for them. they remind me of what I am truly here for.
  • a pause on planning keeps me more connected to the flow of my day. I used to plan my day rigorously, but I've put a hold on that in hope to pay attention to what my day needs from me. especially with my recurrent illness, it's hard to be so responsible and hardworking. so, I allow suprises to greet me whenever possible. also, planning simply ruins the beauty of being inspired and I honestly need more inspiration to captivate my senses.
  • I am grateful for allowing myself to grow organically instead of all at once. regarding my work, I'm getting students in a natural way, allowing word of mouth to do its magic instead of aggressively market. also, I am allowing myself to grow organically, too. I am not chasing new achievements or changes in my psyche, allowing them to take form slowly. the big picture is becoming intricately complex and despite having major setbacks along the way, when they pass, I find the learnings acquired so cardinal to my healing and growth.
  • the human body never ceases to amaze me. it is quite eerie to have lived so many years without getting sick or tired (except for a few days) and now, find my body breaking down at the slightest attack. it is wonderful how coping mechanisms and the survival mode works. your body simply stays incredibly strong to keep you going and withstands so much pressure. but once it feels safe, it allows itself to crumble. there's so much I am learning about myself and my limits, now.

  • I am grateful for the mornings I can sleep through peacefully. I need it more than ever. I stopped feeling guilty over not starting the day at 5 am and being a zealous early bird. I need that rest. I need that peace.
  • I am grateful for the respect of random strangers in the streets. I am grateful for their questions about my religion and how they revere me and even feel inspired by it. 

that's all. I hope I remember those moments all too well. I pray they make sense one day.

going with grace in an inscrutable world.

Comments

  1. fragmentsfromfelicia26/11/2024, 17:23

    Hi Soraya, I'm the one who asked for your blog on Reddit :). I like your writing (it feels very INFJ if I may say aha!), it's beautiful, thank you for sharing it. I read your last three posts and was wondering which country you live in. I'm sorry to read about your mental and physical health issues right now. It looks like you're handling it as best as can be though, with reflection and rest. I'm saving the link somewhere in my notes, hope to read from you again soon ^^!

    ReplyDelete

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