a daylight dream

T his earthliness is beautiful, captivating, bewildering. I hold your hand as we meander and wander by the valley, the hem of our clothes drowning in dew, my soul drowning in you . As much as it is wondrous, it is temporary. I stare into the snow-laden banks and all the lifeless views. The seasons do freeze our hearts, too. The hastiness of impatience, the impertinent waiting for grace to free fall into the fragile days where it’s empty and cold— when love is nowhere at all. Yet I pray in those seasons that I serve you, loved one. I pray to kneel on my knees and pray one long prayer with you, hold those shrivelled hands and look into your eyes till they tear in soft humility. Serving you by remembering with you, learning to love this earthliness through God’s grace that has befallen on all forms. Tonight, it is speechlessly silent. You’d wish to be here, to push more of you into the vacant spaces of our home. But there is no need, love. It is an ancient nothingness. We can be patient t...

Last week was cold, so cold. So empty, so barren, so devoid with everything inessential. So insensate, so unresponsive. Silent, but not solemnly so. A silence that haunts the heart with fragile emptiness. A humility breathed in with every gale of arctic air, in search of a vulnerable plea of guidance. Last week was all of this, and none of it, at the same time. Despite the boreal gusts, I choose to leave home in the early morning, my lungs almost cast in fractals of ice. My hands turn frigid, even in my pockets, but I still go. I face the seasons of life and watch it all mirror within me with a painful emptiness that is severely worrying. I watch the dawn unfold with rosy and lilac tints, the full moon in its fall, the blackbird soulfully singing its song. And I see the little dandelion petals asleep, arms clasped facing the stars. Venus adorns the eastern horizon with a spectacular glow. Clovers multiply in the shadows of the barren silk floss trees beneath a bed of autumn leaves. All...