a daylight dream

To all of you who are currently on the road to self-love, I'd like to tell you this: it gets easier. It really does, and it's a fact. But, it takes some determination and self-actualisation. It's not something that happens overnight, and perhaps not a state you could reach for good. There will always be lapses and minor break downs because, it was once a habit to hate yourself and put it down. It was once something deeply ingrained in your mind and body and we, as biological organisms, need to give ourselves time to heal and get cured. It's difficult to ascertain the fact that some time one year and a half ago, I hated every particle of myself. To be honest, I liked some of my personality traits but still, I was putting myself down all the time. Looking back at my old pictures and journal entries, I marvel at how far I've come. I used to look in the mirror and shred myself into pieces, but in those pictures, I look beautiful.. and I didn't see it....

I'm addicted to waking up in the morning a few minutes before the sun rises up before me. I love being greeted by the crisp breeze as I'm unable to fully grasp the view in front of me, because my eyes aren't quite used to the enormity of light, having woken up after a magnitude of darkened dreams. I love hearing the blackbirds chirping. I love waking up feeling grateful. I'm addicted to going to the balcony sometime after sunset, when the sky becomes beautifully violet, trying to capture the particular moment when my eyes would see the world in grey, but I'm always disappointed as the street lights switch on a minute too soon.   I'm addicted to spending the hour before I sleep in the balcony, staring at the sky. I had discovered a triangle of stars, always pointing to the north. More specifically, it points in quite a three-dimensional manner upwards, towards the space full of mystery and chimerical magic.   And during that hour, I'm addicte...