august: a glimpse of timeless truths.

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August, you're going. How sweet of you to pass by so amiably, leaving behind a spirit that has glimpsed a transformation, hopefully one that lasts for a while longer than my idea of a lifetime. I'm not here to say much and ramble about endless details of how my days went by. Perhaps it is time to recover themes and reconnect pieces of myself I've always felt attuned to.

I'm leaving in a few days. It feels quite wonderful this time, to say 'i'll see you' to everything I've loved here, especially all the trees and skies. This is what I'm here to reflect upon; this timeless connection to all things, and taking it all with me wherever I go: the stillness of summer, the initiation of the goodbye and the harvest.

It's important for me to see things through my heart. I learned so much about myself this month. I learned about my propensities towards being extremely harsh, limitless and otherwordly, which allows me to lose connection with people and realities I love. I felt so distant and far away from myself, and it occurred to me how much I've lingered in a state of being too demanding of my abilities: always on the lookout for ways to defeat my ego without really needing to. I spent most of my time in introspection, my sensitivity to all things heightened, making me 'see' what wasn't necessary to be seen. All at once, I crumbled under the weight of my flaws and imperfections. It all cried in the language of 'I'll never be good enough.'

Yet, forgiveness was there to cleanse my heart from all the harshness. I kept asking for forgiveness for each time I was unjust and unloving towards the world. Slowly, light pierced through, and I felt rays of lightness and ease pour in one at a time. Wordly dreams that embraced imperfections accompanied my heart, which at times were incredibly intense and captivating, but I allowed it all to slow down and take its time. One lesson I must keep reminding myself of each day is to be with softness and groundedness.

I had fun with my sister going for walks, and trying out frozen coffees around town which were quite discouraging for a second try. Endless bike rides. Sunsets. Tree hugs and conversations with the winds.

I am ever so grateful. May September a truthful emergence of groundedness.

going with grace in an inscrutable world.

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