a daylight dream

Just a little over a year ago, I would ride the bus to school. I would take a seat near the window, put my headphones on and stare at the changing scenes, as October skies flooded with clouds and delicate sunlight. I’d look into them and lapse into deep analysis of where I was heading. I didn’t know where I was heading. The map had the coordinates, the map had every detail.. but I still didn’t know where I was going. In that bus, with music in my ears, I’d breakdown to tears from panic. I’d remember the things I want to do to reach my ideals and feel so small before them. I’d cry fearing to fail. I’d cry feeling lost and confused because I don’t know what I’m doing. I just want to do right— oh world, please let me do it right this time. On the bus I’d remember that I’m all alone. I had just lost connection to ones that mean to me most and my heart was empty. It was struggling to feel safe in the most safe places, because it was lonely. It wanted to hear some beautiful ...

I’ve been absent and I’m sorry. I’ve received some messages from many of you asking me to keep posting and it truly mesmerised me. I’m so grateful for your love and trust. Thank you. :) How has it been lately? Just as I had envisioned it. Everything is falling into place slowly then all at once. Those dreams I dreamt on those pine-covered roads in September, walking as the autumn air brushed my cheeks— they are all coming true. My health, happiness, empowerment, faith in God and selflessness— all is in sync. I am quite fascinated by how miraculous life really is when led by love. But here it comes— a glimpse of doubt. I look around me and see those adults at work and university. I hear them complaining. I watch them talk drearily about how difficult things are. I watch them sarcastically make comments about reality and feel their spite and negativity pierce my soul. Will I end up like them in a few years? Will I lose this love I hold in my heart? I keep asking myself that, ...

We are lying down, face-to-face, and you’ve woken up before me. The moment my eyes open, I can see your inscrutable look, gazing at me like an inextinguishable flame of love. I spend a few moments looking into those beautiful, dark eyes of yours, the distance between them an infinite dimension I could never decipher. Your long, graceful fingers find themselves entwined between my hair, cupping my face with such gentleness that breaks my heart open. My chest inflates with warm air and those little molecules vibrate, touching my ribs, and every exhale feels like a release of a weight so heavily alien. I close my eyes, feeling the tears sting the round ends of my irises, slowly cascading down my cheeks like a soft, blue stream. I bury my face into your chest and feel your arms hold me. My skin touches yours, and I feel held safe, protected and whole. My body becomes as light as a rose, perfectly placed, fitting into your own. Your skin has found a way to hold me without being...

September was transformational and I could write and write about how it turned my world around. Everything I had been experiencing since the beginning of the year was leading me to this relief and lightness that is taking over me. It was beautiful to be alive in September. It didn't start so joyfully, though. The first days of September was marked by tears and sobs of helplessness because I felt so low. I can't explain why. I just didn't feel like myself at all. However, I found access to a stream of knowledge through a book called Becoming Supernatural by Dr. Joe Dispenza, which guided me to know so much about our universe and so many fundamental beliefs that are crucial to uncover the nature of our humanity. Through this book, I went deep into my soul and released pain and let in dreams and selfless ambitions that make me soar.   Before my flight back to Egypt, I worked on being more intimate and close to my sister. I apologised for my distance, studied w...

-on 15.09.2019- Autumn has deeply embodied itself into my heart, as I consciously and heartily observed those yellow-crimson crisp leaves fall on our planet’s ground. Some of those leaves even fall on my shoulder, my hands have held them and sensed their wrinkled surface, dry round the edges, full of forsaken life in their very core. Because we are a reflection of who we think we are, I was deeply afraid of autumn. How would it be like to see life saying goodbye? Melancholic, of course. How would it be like to wake up and find it dark and the air scented frosty from the cold? The thought alone made my heart recoil in shivers. But today I am heading on that airplane back to Egypt. I cried, perhaps more out of love and gratitude than fear. I cried remembering every moment, every wisp of love lacing the entirety of that wistful summer. I cried as I embraced my sister and mother. My heart collapsed onto itself and it felt right. I remembered the pine trees and all of t...

It’s late into the night and you’re not at home but I’m in our little plant-laden balcony, my eyes fixated on the vast space before me; on those little glittery stars flickering in haphazard frequencies that I am very fond of— aligning with the very depth of my heart. And it’s okay that you’re not at home. Dearest, I respect this distance. We’ve been distant for a long time and it didn’t weaken our unearthly bond. We have agreed upon the notion of us treading disparate paths, yet always bound by love. So it’s okay, my dear.  You never have to be here so that we can be together. I place my hands on my heart. I close my eyes and allow the canvas of our sky to lay still and silent in my mind. Gently, I place my head on the pillow and drift into a mystical sleep, filled with peace and quiet, breaths that leave my chest to let go fears and bring in love. The first thing I wake up to is the sound of the blackbirds chirping against the faint peachy rays of light emerging ...

A few days ago, I woke up and went directly outside of the bed, like I always do. But as my feet touched the ground, I felt something different in the way I was moving. I went to the sofa and closed my eyes—  it was happening again. My eyes started tearing up as I sensed this swelling, the approaching brain fog, this feeling of helplessness and hopelessness creeping to my mind. I didn’t want to face it. I wished I could just go back to bed and rewind the night because the day is long and how would I ever be able to make this day beautiful like this, in  this  state? I closed my eyes and tried to remember love. It didn’t work. I spent an hour researching quick fixes to remove the bloat, to improve my mood, to make me feel better. Because today, I want to love the people around me. I want to think of something other than just this stupid sensation of not being well because I was tired of it. I was sick of it. I cried again because I was so scared to fac...

Hello everyone and welcome back to a new Limitless Learning post! So, September is here and it looks like most of you are on the verge of starting a new academic year, whether you're in university or at school. But, I assure you, this academic year is not going to be like any other academic year.. it will be special, meaningful and shining with success and achievement. Because of that, I am here to give you some tips to make sure you start your academic year in the best way possible to ensure success and most importantly, joy. Here are 6 tips you can start implementing to kick start the new academic year in the best way! 1. Set Goals! The best way to start your academic year is to set goals that you'd like to achieve for the year, at least for the first term or semester. I'm not talking about normal goals but holistic ones which encompass your whole school experience. What grades do you want to achieve in your tests and quizzes? How do you want to study? What ...

And so it is the last day of August. The last page to write describing this beautiful summer. The window of a mysterious pathway of healing and ethereal, authentic love. August was a month in which I harvested the magical fruits of the seeds I have planted since June. Of course, it is only the first harvest, still the seeds are not strong enough, the ground not richly fertile; but they are luscious fruits and they're all beuatiful and young. I am proud of how wonderfully they have grown this summer. Okay, enough with those metaphors. The past years proved that August is a month to experience pain, but I didn't intend it this time around. There is pain in August, but I redirected my focus to somehow accept that yes, it's time to say goodbye to all of those wonderful, summery memories. However, there are other fulfilling aspects that have to be remembered and honoured. I have worked hard for so many things and I wanted to witness them evolve and show me the mag...

I pretend to forget to draw the curtains every night before we go to sleep, because something in me just wants to watch the car-lights reflect on our golden walls just before we fade to the darkness of our minds in the hours of the night. My eyes just desire to wake up each morning with the sun shining brightly, and I don’t want to sleep in,  ever , with such a blessing to witness every single day. And this morning, I wake up to a ray of light streaming in a straight line towards the mirror, and my eyes follows its reflection in a daze, till I land on a beautiful tiny rainbow on our desks. I smile— and I hope it’s an omen to make our day as colourful as we possibly can. And then I look at you, dearest, facing me, your gentle eyes asleep and I can see your imperfections clearly. Just a few summers ago, this moment was a dream— and now I wake up to watch you breathe. And then I think to myself— I touch my face and I realise   I’m so imperfect, too. I imagine you ope...