Sophomore Year: A Reflection.

What an astounding year, truly. I may need to admit that it had been one of the most profound I’ve ever lived in so many terms. There had been ups and downs, but I don’t think I minded them like I used

Accepting my moments of confusion and overwhelm perhaps made it easier in so many ways, because it has been proven that things get clearer when you exert more effort and take baby steps to get to where you want. They mean nothing sometimes, but mostly, they do lead somewhere.

University

It had been challenging in some way, but also enlightening in others. For starters, there were some courses that I disliked as they were too general and oversimplified, and I find muse in sophisticated concepts. Thus, I would find myself not studying fervently but only doing so to get it over with. However, I compensated this loss of interest with research and linking those concepts to areas I find compelling like education and holistic health. Yet, I paid the price of not being able to balance out research and extra-curricular work with my actual assigned curriculum so I fell behind a little. I don’t regret it though, and I’m working hard this month to get the best grades possible this semester. All in all, I learned a lot.

Work

It had been truly enchanting. The whole experience was one of a kind, and I’m just blessed to have had the opportunity to learn so much being a part-time teacher assistant. You know that I’m passionate about teaching in general, and I’ve got a long way to go in order to master it. I’ve been through some daunting moments having to deal with teachers and work pressure and it made me feel so hopeless at times, but this never lasts. Those students taught me more than I could ever teach them, and I relished developing loving and respectful relationships; giving them the space to confide in me with their issues, ask questions and be who they are. I have so much to work on in terms of classroom management, leadership and clear presentation skills and I’m willing to work on it those few university years to get better.

I also learned so much giving those private English lessons, it was more of a kind of 

mentorship experience in which I learned how to empower students rather than just be there to teach and give limited academical value. I did my best to make sure the time that student spent with me urged him to become the best version of himself; I reminded him of his dreams and through our English work, showed him how to realise them. Of course, it wasn’t as easy and so many times, I’d be faced with fear of not being good enough. I struggled with confidence and insecurity but I’m sure that’s only the downside of wanting to master what I do. I need constant reminders that what I’m doing is actually worthwhile, and those motivators are not always freely present.

But it’s been amazing.

Soulmates

Two years now in university, I only have one friend. But she is more than just a friend— a soulmate. A kindred spirit who understands my concerns and believes we can change our little lives by adding consistent value to what’s surrounding us. This year granted us more time together in which we walked, talked and built dreams. I cannot adequately express how profound the difference she imprinted is, but it’s evident and beautiful. Also, I’ve met someone who radiantly shifted my world by just letting me believe in magic. Our bond was more than just unearthly— it was chimerical. I can’t really express more than this for it’s unfathomably inscrutable, by all means.

This year has given me a lot, and I can now reap the rewards of the mountain-fold of gracious gratitude crowning my soul. I’ve never been so grateful, even in those difficult times. I’ve been weak and scared, but I didn’t let that prevail.

My dad and I. We learned so much together.

Thank you, world. Thank you for allowing my intentions to become fulfilled; giving me the chance to interact with more people and practise kindness, love and support.

I’m just glad I can now define challenges as blessings, that’s all.