Thoughts On Health.

My sanctuary.

By health, I mean mental and physical health, which are both crucial. I know that hospitals and medical centres are usually a sign of physical treatment centres. However, I believe that mind and soul are related to the mechanical body by a sort of ethereal connection, magically seen as a string of sparkling magic between two wands. As both grow further apart, the string becomes more feeble and fragile until it is finally extinguished, both ends eventually lose the marvel of having had such a connection.

Sour apples :)

So earthly matters first, and I mean by this, my body which is existent on Earth only -for the time being ;)-. I am overjoyed to say that I'm healing in a way or another. For once, I don't feel stressed, which means loads less of adrenaline and cortisol around my cells. I feel more lose, more energetically-balanced. Also, my hair is stronger now, I'm astonished by the way my hair doesn't actually go in weird directions when I put it up in a ponytail. It used to be dead and pretty awful. But I guess those estrogen pills I'm taking are helping, plus my olive oil replacement routine (later!). Hmm, there's also that my cycle has started after a year of vacation, which feels so comforting but I have no idea whether it shall continue even after I stop taking medication or not. I'm a bit anxious  but I'm working on it.

Coming to my mind and soul, I cannot feel more grateful for the blessing to actually feel at peace. I have to say that my anxiety and worrisome dispositions are becoming so rare! Yes I do feel anxious sometimes, especially around food, but wonderfully, a voice I never heard before tells me that's it's okay, and that blabbering devilish other voice does not reside within me, it's just an old apparition, and I believe it because I really want to. I want to be okay again, which is really new. I've recognised that I don't have a problem to stop playing sports for a day or two as well, I mean, I used to practice for 2-3 hours everyday last year but I'm content with 2 hours 3-4 times a week now. I usually swim, and relax my body totally. I take deep breaths and do some stretching exercises every 10 minutes, which amounts my real sport time to 1 hour and a half or so. The days where I actually stay at home, I do vinyasa yoga which is spirit-lifting, relaxing and energy-busting so that I don't really feel hyped for the rest of the day, which is an accomplishment! I also dance a little, and do some stretching workouts for flexibility and posture. All in all, I just burn some of the energy and I'm okay for the rest of the day. :) I must confess that I'm also more daring and fearless these days, I'm not afraid to do what's right and to face change and take life smartly. I like the new me. But then I remembered, I'm always evolving which is amazingly intriguing because then I can feel this new sensation every once in a while.

Sometimes I read my journal which I kept last year, and my heart feels such a deep sorrow, my entries were truly devastating and I realise I was in a very daunted state. I thank God for transitioning my soul into a more accepting, enduring state. AlhamduliAllah.

I'm hopeful. All I really know is that I believe in myself. Also, time.

Soraya.