Enrapturing Highlights of 2024.

-



it’s the first time in so long that I decide not to do a detailed, comprehensive month-by-month reflection. to do that would feel like a soulful homicide, having to reminisce all the burdensome memories of last year. of course, in hindsight, so many beautiful things have happened, too. despite the hindrances, I’ve come through with beautiful achievements. it’s beautiful how it all connects backwards, only in hindsight.

also, I am grateful that I have worked on all of my intentions which I had pinned down in this blog, and it is rather miraculous that the events somehow added up to allow them to take shape. 


today, I just want to share all the positive, magical memories of this year because recently, I have become entranced by God’s mercy in this universe. chanting Al-Rahman Al-Raheem after each prayer, I found myself in tears, connecting to that core value in me that I have abandoned for some time which is how I love noticing mercifulness and the universe’s gifts. it was a habit of mine, observing nature’s continuous gifts falling upon our laps, streams of sunshine and rivers of water, a never-ending supply of grace. and people, too. how even evilness is a mercy; for it breaks hearts enough for them to believe in love.


I do not want to mention any negative moments as I usually do in these posts. I will only mention the beautiful, sacred memories I will hold deeply in my heart. so, here is a month-by-month reflection. :)


January



  • watching movies with my sister and mom with the fireworks in the background.
  • reveling in the snowfall and taking long walks soaking the beauty in.
  • weekends in Warsaw playing squash and meeting new people.
  • treating my H. pylori virus and feeling hungry for the first time in ages.
  • eating burgers and pizza.
  • starting a small business, working in the mall.
  • winter and wedding shopping mall visits with my mom.
  • connecting to my family.
  • inner child healing sessions in the forest.
  • cold-air bicycle rides.


February



  • finding a beautiful wedding dress.
  • dancing with my sister with crazy music.
  • Valentine’s day. :’)
  • going back to Egypt for wedding preparations.
  • meeting my Sheikh in the zawya.
  • beautiful memories with beautiful friends and family members.
  • a surprise bridal shower made by my friends.
  • getting married on the day I saw in my dreams.
  • a sacred, heart-warming wedding.
  • a magnificent honeymoon in Marsa Allam.


March


  • camping near the sea, gazing at the stars, in the middle of nowhere.
  • eating fish in Hurghada till we passed out.
  • first Ramadan in freedom.
  • the taraweeh prayers with family.
  • cooking mouth-watering meals for my husband.
  • visiting Bochum to meet family.
  • flying airplanes with children.
  • going to an extreme line park.
  • the 16-hour bus ride adventure.
  • Free Palestine rallies.


April




  • watching the apple and magnolia blossoms bloom in the garden.
  • planning a surprise trip to Egypt to celebrate Eid with family.
  • crying in tahajjud prayers, asking for God’s mercy.
  • praying in the zawya and listening to Sheikh Salah.
  • meeting my best friends.
  • the very first Eid prayer with my husband. :’)
  • Eid family gatherings with the children.


May



  • the beauty of spring.
  • picking lilac flowers.
  • lying down in a field of daisies.
  • falling in love with the flowers of spring.
  • running in the park and feeding the squirrels.
  • gatherings with friends.
  • taking a break from work to focus on my health.
  • squash trainings.
  • piano lessons with a kindred spirit.



June


  • the summer skies— colossal sunset clouds.
  • buying myself a piano.
  • the poppy and wildflower meadows.
  • buying plants and flowers for my home.
  • buying my own bicycle.
  • praying Eid and having a Eid picnic in the park.
  • visiting Krakow and the theme park. :’)
  • endless bicycle rides.


July



  • founding Ecoligence and creating a holistic learning summer course.
  • feeling alive with my learners.
  • starting my child coaching journey.
  • getting so much better at piano and learning more music.
  • my birthday gift from my husband.
  • the summer trip to Egypt.
  • meeting my best friends.
  • meeting my learners and going on bicycle rides together.



August



  • going to the sea.
  • having brilliant memories with the children of the family.
  • soaking in the sunset by the sea and forgetting myself.
  • frappuccino dates with my husband.
  • starting my positive psychology coaching certification.
  • starting my medication for IBS.
  • enjoying fruits, pain-free.
  • the Arab community picnic in the late summer air.
  • the late summer marigolds.
  • having my sister’s cat for a week and feeling the sweetness of taking care of him.



September



  • exploring the city.
  • giving a free back-to-school workshop for learners.
  • starting my academic year course and expanding my work.
  • reading books.
  • the glory of autumn colours.
  • brilliant sunshine and golden trees.
  • the perfect weather for walks and bicycle rides.
  • reading books.
  • breaking running records.
  • being able to eat without experiencing stomach pain.


October



  • planning a trip to Paris.
  • ice-cream dates with my husband.
  • running the afternoons away.
  • having breakfast in the old town and going on park dates.
  • paris, oh paris— and celebrating my husband’s birthday there.


November



  • Berlin with family, visiting the zoo and endless talks with the kids.
  • Zakopane with my mom, and the crowded, long car rides.
  • flower painting.
  • learning one of my favourite songs on the piano.
  • the first snowfall of the season.
  • skiing jacket weather.


December

  • becoming a certified positive psychology coach.
  • not leaving home for almost a week, connecting to myself.
  • capturing memories with a film camera.
  • visiting the cat cafe and petting the kittens.
  • plans to adopt a kitten.
  • seeing the snow on the mountains for the first time.
  • playing with the snow with my husband. 
  • buying Christmas gifts.
  • meeting my family on Christmas and feeling the warmth of belonging.
  • discovering new music.
  • endless journalling sessions.
  • choosing to write this. 💗


so, there. some months are definitely empty, and you can tell from that that I did have more harsh days than not. however, in the in-between, there were some beautiful days to recount. I am sure 2025 will be a gift. I am just sure of it and have so much faith.


thank you for your mercy, dearest God.


going with grace in an inscrutable world.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

airplane healing pains.

-
Image
An airplane signifies so many unknowns, so many variables, with a constant ‘ me ’. An anxious fear surges from the pit of my stomach, always questioning whether I’ll ever be strong enough to deal with the discomfort of newness. My breaths are sharp here, in the transition, heading towards the side of practical realms. I’m scared of what is left to heal to embrace my ideals. What if I’m not able to withstand the healing pains and sheddings? A few tears trickle by, summer stillness shedding, leaving me vulnerable and bare in the act itself. It’s endearing to witness and disconcerting to feel. Where will I be next summer? How would it be like to be a year older towards the person who has been gifted so many daylight dreams? I’m back to the solitude of my essence. The realisation that most of my journeying is done in darkness, pain and cycles— upon completion, they radiate a revealing light that serves and heals. But not before the transmutation, not before the healing, not before the ferv...
click to read

A Matter of Strength.

-
Image
As much as I believe my intuition is a virtue, in my society, it's often taken as granted. In order to win, I need to act tough. I need to act as if I'm invincible. I need to act whatever happens doesn't affect me. More that I used the word 'act' instead of be, and that is where the problem comes. I cannot act, I can only be. And even those times I act in, I fail hideously.   The other day, I was supposed to meet a teacher to pick up some work materials. We were supposed to meet on a specified hour in some place. 5 minutes before, I was already in the venue, waiting as usual. Half an hour passed, and she did not come. I called, she said there was traffic but it was already clearing up.. she promised me another fifteen minutes. So I waited. I waited for an hour and a half. I was forced to leave because I was in the car, sweating and getting a sun stroke, with the temperature at its highest peak for the day. My dad, of course, was nervous...
click to read

Recent Things I'm Grateful For.

-
Image
I have always believed that the little moments were the ones to most cherish for the astounding way they make us feel fulfilled and alive. However, I don't know what happened that made me quite focused on attaining the bigger things and trying to perfect my own character which kept me off-track. Back again to my true self, I can inherently declare that it is the little things that allow us to experience sheer joy and content. It's not the goals we reach, it's the journey we decide to embark, which constitutes the little habits that we carry out every single day.   We always want to change to the better; to be more graceful, kind, loving and grounded. There's no better way capturing this than quietly thinking about what we are truly grateful for. I have some goals, many actually. I am quite future-focused (which is not always a great thing), but it occurred to me that I'd rather enjoy the journey towards my ideals, chasing them with fulfilment, love and p...
click to read

intentions of 2025: a foundational year.

-
Image
hello, 2025. I welcome you in my arms, receiving your brand new beginning where I can rewrite the story of my life path. here I am, a woman in so much need of something so terribly new so that I can forget everything about my past and start as someone new. yes, someone new. that is not a typo. there’s so much we need to change around here and I am onto it, make little baby steps as we slide into this year’s seasons. despite all that is there to change, I am grateful that the gift of visualising the year and crafting new intentions is not one of the things on my list. that could stay, along with creating vision boards for all of the beautiful dreams floating in the landscape of my heartful desires. I wish you could see my vision board. it involves a splash of watercolours, piano melodies, the dream of raising a kitten and starting my journey in gardening. also, a travelling spree to where there is a calling sea and perhaps, an umrah. my dreams are nascent, but their vibe are preparing m...
click to read

what am I grieving?

-
Image
those days are heavy on my heart. a constant resistance to that uncanny feeling of grieving something I am not even sure I am aware of. there’s this loss of something profound, living in the unknown and plunging myself into valleys of hope every single day, just to be failed by their condescending stillness. I’m not sure why I’m sad, but it’s like I’ve lost myself. it’s like I’m grieving the loss of the life I’ve always known. sitting down by the tombstones of my coping mechanisms that don’t make sense in my world now. feeling the suffering of not having something to worry about or be scared of. they say that depression comes to show us what we’ve been repressing all along, a slowly-brewed suffering ripening. my mind keeps finding ways to resist this sadness and change its ways.  my soul tells me to feel it, to be it. my sadness is relentlessly self-sabotaging, isolating and it knows exactly how to constrict the universe into a set of known routines and familiar sounds. it validat...
click to read