please, don’t make me forget.

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When it’s dark again, and it gets darker later now that it’s spring, I go back intentionally.

I go back to when the world was coloured in the sweetest green and gold. When the sky was soft in lilac hues and the earth was the perfect kind of dry grey, softened by the moist sand underground.


I go back to when I sat with you, your eyes wide but at peace. Your eyes soaking the beauty of the world so gently and my doubt dissolving in sunshine.


It’s been two nights now and I keep going back. I pray not to forget. Oh God, why do we forget? I don’t want to.. I want to remain this soft, this present, this selfless. Please, help me not to forget.


Help me remember how it felt like so I could keep giving with such grace. Help me remember so that I continue to serve You in the name of love.


Dearest God, help me remember, even if it feels like dying. I’m willing to die again and again— but I just want to keep remembering my truth, and it’s who I saw in your wide, inscrutable eyes and your skin glowing with ethereal hues of celestial beingness.


Please, do not make me forget ever again.

going with grace in an inscrutable world.

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